Teenage Daughter

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Teenage Daughter

Post by Tkay on Mon Nov 16, 2009 2:07 pm

Hi all,
I hve a teenage daughter who I am raising alone. I have the help of grandparents of course, but it would help if she had ever had a father, who really cared about her. Her dad and I divorced when she was 9 and she will be 16 next month. She has been terribly hurt that her dad, doesn't want anything to do with her. He only calls when he wants something and that is only to her older brother or his own father. She has seen him only once in 6 1/2 years. She no longer refers to him as her dad.

I blame alot of what is going on, on that and the fact she is a hormonal teenager.

She likes a guy that is too old for her and is doing things out of character for her. I am worried about what all of this will bring and do not want her to get so serious with this guy. I am having to get mean about it now and she is barely speaking to me. We all cannot be around her to watch her every move. I also do not want to to anything that will drive her straight to him.

I am just really praying that she will turn to God more and let him fill the holes in her heart.

Really exasperated her and a lil scared.


Thanks.

Tkay
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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by Cholette on Mon Nov 16, 2009 3:24 pm

Oh Tkay, I just want to hug you.

I SO know what you are going through and I can sympathize AND empathize with you because I raised a son by myself and the high school years are probably the most trying.

At this point, you can't be her friend and you have to give the tough love out on a CONSISTENT basis. The moment you stop being consistent you have to start all back over again. She will hate you (on the surface), but you have to push through that.

The one thing that I can identify with in regards to you daughter is this...I had a dad in my home, but he was emotionally UNavailable. He was always working and if I had an issue, he was never there as a father to help me. My mother was a bit distant because of her issues with my dad so I was alone to handle my own stuff. I know what it feels like to NOT have a fathers love and attention. I was just like your daughter, I went after older men...WAY MUCH older than I care to admit to, but when I looked back on that I realized I was looking for my father in other men.

You have to entrust your daughter into the Lord's hand and let him take care of her. Trust me, it's the hardest thing to do in the beginning because the natural mind wants to take over, but how awesome is it to have a Heavenly Father on your team that goes everywhere she goes and sees everything she does? No natural father can do that...you have an advantage with the Lord. You may do what I did...I put my son on the altar about a million times until I finally left him there and guess what? I've been in peace ever since. My son has made some choices with body piercings and tattoos that I don't agree with since he's been away in college, but I don't say a word. I look to heaven and tell the Lord "Do you see what your son did? Handle it Lord!"...a few months later, my son decided to remove the piercings because he was trying to get a job.

God is good Tkay! Hang in there and if you ever need anyone to vent to...I'm here because I've been there and done that...

Much prayer going up for you...

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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by Virtuous on Mon Nov 16, 2009 4:30 pm

Oh, how I wish every daughter who has been without a father in their lives could hear this cd I have titled, "A Father's Love". I have never shared with anyone - ANYONE - how I feel about my father. I was a daddy's little girl - meaning, He couldn't do no wrong even when he did wrong. I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVED my dad but he wasn't there for me like he should've been. One day I was at the altar crying out to God (from within) and my Pastor came up to me and said, "Sister ?, Bishop told me to give this cd to you. He wants you to listen to it over and over again until it gets into your spirit."

That was God who put me on Bishops heart and reveal to him how I struggled with loving my dad with all of my heart and yet feeling so empty and so hurt because I NEVER told anyone!

THAT cd changed my life!

I'll be right back. I have to go to Praise & Worship practice.

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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by Cholette on Mon Nov 16, 2009 5:17 pm

Is it a teaching from your Bishop? Or is it someone where it can be ordered?

I'm a daddy's girl NOW...yes, even at the age of 42. My dad came around in his older age, but the time when it was needed the most, he was absent.


Do not fight FOR victory, but fight FROM THE PLACE of victory. Jesus has ALREADY won the battle!

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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by Virtuous on Mon Nov 16, 2009 7:53 pm

My bad. I meant to say my Bishop's brother. He's a pastor. It's a teaching from Bishops brother.

The thing about it is I don't even ever remember meeting him, actually. From what Pastor told me, we were at Bishop's church and he saw me. She told me he told Bishop I needed it. God is something ain't he?

I'm going to see how big it is. Maybe I can download and forward it to you. If not, I'll either do a manual transcript of it and send it or you can give me your mailing address and I'll mail it to you.

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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by Dove-Solutions on Tue Nov 17, 2009 4:10 am

Oh me too please.


~Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Himand He will direct your path.~ Proverbs 3:5-6

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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by usemeLord on Tue Nov 17, 2009 6:03 am

We thank you Father in Heaven you see and know all our hurts and desires. I pray that the desires of this teenager would line up with your word. We ask you to surround her with friends that will help and not hinder her towards any movement towards you and your love. I ask that you bind any and all of the enemies plans for this girl in Jesus name and surround her with your love. I ask that you show her your love continually in Jesus name.

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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by Virtuous on Tue Nov 17, 2009 10:55 am

Hi, Ladies!

I ripped the cd so I could email it but it's too big. Actually, it's only a 30 minute teaching, but the cd is made up of 37 different tracks...know what I mean? I'll just have to do a manual transcript and send it that way.

Well, wait a minute...

I went to this link to see if it can be ordered but I don't see it anywhere. There is a "contact us" tab that you may be able to inquire about it.

The title of it is "Father's Love".

www.graceoutreachbiblechurch.com

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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by Dove-Solutions on Tue Nov 17, 2009 11:51 am

Thanks V.....for trying to send and giving info. Will check it out tonight.

Love in Jesus


Connie


~Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Himand He will direct your path.~ Proverbs 3:5-6

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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by Tkay on Wed Nov 18, 2009 2:24 pm

THANKS to everybody for their thoughts and prayers. I will look at the manual transcript when you get it or if you still want my add. I will give that to you as well.

I did have an awesome father and was definetly a daddy's girl, but he was taken from me to soon. I feel some of the decisions I have made, she is suffering from now.

I have always been afraid of her looking for a fathers attention in the wrong way.


Thanks again!!

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Re: Teenage Daughter

Post by butterfly on Thu Jan 07, 2010 4:19 pm


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Re: Teenage Daughter

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