Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

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Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Virtuous on Thu May 28, 2009 9:06 am

Does anyone have any thoughts/answers as to why God reveal husbands/wives beforehand to some and not to others?


Last edited by Virtuous on Thu May 28, 2009 9:08 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Grammar)

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Cholette on Thu May 28, 2009 12:11 pm

Great Question Virtuous!! Being one who knows who her husband is I have asked the Lord this question a lot over the years and have not received a question to WHY.

I let go of the possibility of meeting this "dream man" for about six years because I never met anyone who knew who their husbands or wives were beforehand until I came to this site. None of my friends know or knew who their husbands were, but I did. It seemed strange to me and then to top it off, I was hearing different ministers saying that God is NOT into "arrange" marriages. I heard that so much that I just stopped believing and got into "wait" mode for whoever was going to come my way.

One day I was led to Genesis and began reading about how God created Eve from Adams rib. God went some place and built her in private and brought her to Adam and then he said "bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh". My eyes bugged out of my head because that to me is God creating someone especially for him. I know your question is "Why does he reveal to some and not to others" and the only thing I could ever come up with is that it's his sovereign will. There are plenty of people who never knew beforehand, but will tell you in a heartbeat that they were made for each other.

Maybe Daphanie could shed some light on this because she is the ONLY one I ever met that dreamed, met and married her dream man. I'm interested in what others have to say on this.

Blessings

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Virtuous on Thu May 28, 2009 12:48 pm

I have a sister in Christ who knows too. She's known for years.

Oh, by the way...noone could ever tell me God is NOT into "arranged" marriages or there is no such thing as "a match made in heaven."

I just wondered if there was a significance to knowing beforehand...one knowing (man/woman)and the other(man/woman) not knowing...you know; that sort of thing.

Does anyone think if God reveals it to one he will reveal it to the other? Meaning...ok; Cholette, you for example...Do you think God has revealed to the man that you are to be his wife?

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Vile on Thu May 28, 2009 3:05 pm

I've "known" three times... the first one with signs and wonders. I'm sick of knowing and being played by the devil, so I've given up.

Not on the entire concept, but I just really don't care... I really want a husband, but... like I said, I don't care.

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Cholette on Thu May 28, 2009 3:22 pm

Yes...he knows who I am. It's been confirmed through several prophets over the years. I even had a lady...come up to me (which is one of the reasons why I started back believing) say to me that I let go of a dream, but I needed to pick it back up again because he's on the way and he will know you when he sees you. The strange thing about it is I saw him from a distance at a gospel concert and we locked eyes. I think I was so stunned I ran the other way. Not sure what his reaction was, but LORD HAMMERCY that was a trip!!! :blushing:


Do not fight FOR victory, but fight FROM THE PLACE of victory. Jesus has ALREADY won the battle!

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Cholette on Thu May 28, 2009 3:23 pm

By the way Vile...don't give up on "the man" or the idea that you know about him. You don't have to be waiting on pins and needles, but please don't give up because it's for a purpose that you know. We really don't know why we were chosen to know, but we gotta know it's for a purpose, right?


Do not fight FOR victory, but fight FROM THE PLACE of victory. Jesus has ALREADY won the battle!

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Vile on Thu May 28, 2009 3:26 pm

Thing is, even Satan can pull signs and wonders. This whole "know" baloney has been a head trip too many times. I just need to stop worrying about it and let God be God.

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Cholette on Thu May 28, 2009 4:25 pm

Okay...Amen...Just trying to encourage you!!! huggins


Do not fight FOR victory, but fight FROM THE PLACE of victory. Jesus has ALREADY won the battle!

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Vile on Thu May 28, 2009 7:13 pm

I appreciate it! I just need to stop looking for signs and wonders and look for God. :)

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by True Flight on Thu May 28, 2009 7:33 pm

Vile wrote:I appreciate it! I just need to stop looking for signs and wonders and look for God. :)

That's a very profound statement.

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Desiree (Starpop) on Thu May 28, 2009 8:09 pm

I think it all depends on the plan that God has for your life and the individual. God tells some and then he doesn't tell others (until later) because they may not be able to handle the information at the time. God knows what's best for each of us--so what may work for one may not work for another--its all according to the plan God has for your life. Also, God gives us choices, so I believe its up to us to use discernment and wisdom (coupled with time of fervent prayer/fasting) to let God show us if whom we pick is the "Right one" for us or not. Someone once told me, "Anything of God is good." If God told us "every detail of the plan" there would be no reason to have faith or to trust in God completely right?

I am one that doesn't know whom my husband-to-be is, but I know when I will meet him (God has given me an exact time). For me, its all about trusting God to give me that man when He's ready for me to have him. I think that if I knew whom mine was I wouldn't be ready! Besides, I like the thrill of not knowing sometimes--I want to be thoroughly surprised!! rofl I pray that when I DO meet the one that we both will know without a shadow of a doubt that we are for one another!

Whomever it is, God will bring you clarity and confirmation. I encourage you to read moderator Daphanie's story/testimony of how she met her husband. God showed her the signs/characteristics of her future mate even though she hadn't met him yet! She trusted in God and waited on HIM to move--Let God be your matchmaker and he won't disappoint and I don't believe she's disappointed in any way either!! lol! :clap: Do what you need to do now so that you can prepare yourself--get in that kitchen and practice cooking, dress nice wherever you go, work on the fruits in your life, let God be your first priority, etc. I'm learning that if I want an "Excellent mate" I have to make myself excellent for my mate as well!!

God says that he "WILL fulfill the desires of the righteous". He'll give you what you want because you're asking for God's will to be done in your life.

I wonder too though, if whom I'm praying for God has revealed me to him as well or will we just know about eachother when God places us together during that appointed time? thinking

I encourage everyone to read the stories of Esther, Ruth & Boaz, Jacob and Rachel, Isaac and Rebekkah, as perfect examples of how true Godly-ordained marriages/matchups happened/need to be! The stories blessed my soul and gave me a new perspective of just how God gives/shows us our mates!

Great topic!


Last edited by Desiree (Starpop) on Thu May 28, 2009 8:15 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Desiree (Starpop) on Thu May 28, 2009 8:11 pm

Vile,
Though you are right when you say satan has his signs and wonders ( which by the way are counterfeit) but when God has his signs and wonders, peace follows--there's no confusion!

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Virtuous on Fri May 29, 2009 7:20 am

I agree with everything Cholette and Desiree have said. You know...I have just been thinking about the purpose of some knowing while others don't. THERE HAS GOT TO BE A PURPOSE. I am just curious to know.

God has allowed me to know who it wasn't but I'm not sure about if He's actually told me who he is. I thought I knew at one time but now I don't think it's him. Even if it was him, I think what I did is ONE of probably a million reasons why God doesn't reveal it to some of us. Maybe it's because we don't handle the information well.

God gave me a dream a few months ago and the man I saw in my dream was my husband. We weren't married in the dream but I just knew he was my husband and I felt like he knew it as well. I didn't recognize him (not ever meeting him IRL) but I knew it was him.

Sometimes I want to know exactly who he is and then there are times that I don't want to know and like Desiree, I want to be surprised...just mind blowing! happy dance

The only thing about this is the fact that I know if God doesn't tell me I'm to marry this man (whenever we meet)...IT'S A WRAP! I don't want to invest any time into a relationship and getting my emotions all tied up in a man if he's not the man God has chosen for me.

Cholette...you are a mess! You have me laughing so hard! You ran the other way?! rofl

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Cholette on Fri May 29, 2009 9:05 am

Yes Virtuous...I ran the other way. When your dreams meet your reality, it is a trip. My friend was calling me crazy all the way home. She kept saying that I messed everything up and I may have missed God because I ran, but I don't believe that. I believe whenever it happens it will happen and things will go smoothly. I think the fact that I saw him, and I got that close to him was God's way of saying "I got you girl...it's going to happen". You have to know that he is well known in my area...a public figure. So the chances of me being in the same place as him was ONLY God!!

I'm sort of happy I know because I'm 42 years old...I've never been married...it's time out for dating and going around figuring stuff out. If I was in my 20's or early 30's then that wouldn't be a problem, but I've crossed that "freedom" threshold and mama don't have time to weed through the crowd tryin to find out who's right and who's not. I agree with you Virtuous...me knowing and once he shows up...IT'S A WRAP!!!! :roflx:

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Virtuous on Fri May 29, 2009 9:33 am

I can only imaging the thoughts going through your friends mind! Everytime I look at you I would "live" laughing! No, I don't think you missed God either. You're right...things will go smoothly (without the running :yes: !...I just can't get over that! I wish I could've been there and knew you at that time!

I'm sort of happy I know because I'm 42 years old...I've never been married...it's time out for dating and going around figuring stuff out.
I'm 36 and I'm with you on this. I just know how hard it is, for me- I'm saying, to let go of emotions I feel towards a man I've dated (and you know what else Censored ). So I would just rather not get involved, even in dating, than to have to wrestle with letting go.

What I meant by it being a wrap is after meeting someone then seeking God about him being the "ONE"; if God doesn't reveal to me that he is...It's a wrap. The relationship (as far as dating) is over...Stick a fork in it cuz it's done.

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Cholette on Fri May 29, 2009 11:50 am

Oh my goodness Virtuous!!! We are so much alike!!! thumbs

I won't even go into it, but we are SO MUCH ALIKE!!!!!!!!!!! :zipit:

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Virtuous on Fri May 29, 2009 12:35 pm

I'm not surprised! I kinda figured that myself...

THERE'S TWOOOOOOO OF UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUS...Look out world - Here we come! tornado

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Desiree (Starpop) on Fri May 29, 2009 3:13 pm

First of all I just wanted to say to Virtuous and Cholette that you are awesome women for being 43 and 36 and STILL waiting on the one! I couldn't do it--I've been burning far too long already!!! lol! rofl May God continuously bless you both!

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Cholette on Sat May 30, 2009 8:42 am

Well thank you Desi...so much! The only thing is...even though I love being in my 40's and I feel the best I've ever felt before, I just wanted you to know that I'm 42 not 43...at least not until another 7 months or so... whistle hee hee

Since we are on this topic, I wanted to share a really niiiiiice story that I heard from one of our church members last night. I noticed a glow about him. I joked with him and asked him was he pregnant or something...hehehe. He told me that he was getting married...I was shocked because I never saw him with anyone and he is a pretty reserved type of guy. We sat down and he shared with me the beautiful testimony. He said that after his divorce 6 years ago, which included a horrifying custody battle, he decided he never wanted to be married again. Back in December, he had to go to the east coast for a meeting and he told himself that he was going to go and visit his sister and bro-in-law. The night before, he was praying for them and the Lord spoke to his heart and said that he wanted him to tell his sister to take him to the neighbors house. He was shocked, but since he is heavily into evangelism, he felt it was to pray or lead someone to Christ.

When he went to his sister's house the next day, he asked his sister to take him over there. She was shocked because it didn't make since to her. She took him over there and he said the most beautiful woman answered the door. He froze...he couldn't get two words out of his mouth. He figured that it wasn't her that he was there for so he finally said "is the man of the house home?" She told him the only man of the house was her three year old son. He quickly said okay and left.

He goes back to his hotel and begins praying and praying asking God what was he doing and if he missed him. God said "you are the man at the door"...of course he didn't know what that meant so he went back the next day and apologized to young lady and said that the Lord had asked him to come to her door and he didn't understand why, but if she needed prayer for anything he would pray. Instead of prayer, they finally switched phone numbers and to make a LONG story short...he had to leave out early the next morning, but they stayed on the phone all night until it was time for him to leave for the airport. He said that she told him that God spoke to her heart a year ago and said, "I am sending your husband to your front door"...that is all God told her. She is much like me because she analyzed it and didn't think it was literal, but it was. Once she told him that, he understood what God meant when he said "you are the man at the door". He said after seeing her at the front door, he knew in his heart that she would be his wife, but when they spoke on the phone and everything lined up...oh my!!!!!

They met in December and he flew out there in February to ask her for her hand in marriage. I used to think that you had to date someone for awhile to make it official and to see if they were the right person, but I think that I'm wrong on that. If God confirms this blatently that someone is your mate, why do you need to date for an extensive amount of time? I understand that you have to get to know that person, but does it take that long? They are going through the proper steps of premarital counseling, which at my church is pretty extensive.

I think this story is SO GOD!! This is how he puts people together in this season...supernatural and quick. I just thought I would share with all of you...I thought this was a GREAT STORY!!

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Vile on Sat May 30, 2009 8:50 am

If ever you needed evidence that God has a sense of humor... *LOL*

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by LovetoworshipJesus on Sat May 30, 2009 10:21 am

Hi everyone you know I had to add. Yes I truly believe God does reveal that helpmate. It took me about clse to 2 1/2 yrs to understand and the same question I asked and God would confirm everytime to me or through prophecy. In fact I know what his calling is. I was married before. So I asked God to reveal to me who My lovemate, helpmate would be, because Encounter the wrong men before. SO About 2 yrs ago I told God dont allow no men to come my way unless it was my husband. But little did I now. He sent him to me. BUt I Had no wisdom of my spirtual gifts. I was very young in the spirit. So I ask GOd why did he allow me to meet him and we not together and I realize that he had more work in me. I am gald he did this way. I mean I have more evidence to give concerning my Man of GOD. To conclude I am happy to know who he is although it has been challenging waiting. GOd taught me to wait on his timing, because I was a go getter meaning I see him and I will get him. Thank GOD I am no longer like that. I have my guard up and I can tell when a man approach whats his agenda because of the gift of discernment. God imparted in me many gift for his Glory. Lately for about 3weeks now I have rcv signs and confirmation about my helpmate and they been coming back to back. I saw this pretty green dress I like. I was like God I would like to be wearing this dress when he comes. I find it quite strange bit i really drawn to this dress and I just really got into the green. I mean the dress its long and flowie. Like a summer dress. I told God I really want to look nice and he be looking good to when I see him. lol!! THis man of God is handsom, smart, has wisdom, and he loves the Lord. Anyday I expect him. I been asking GOd when he will come and gave me a confirmation. So I will let ya know soon!! By the way I am 30 with no children And I took sometime to get me together and I can feel in the spirit that he coming real soon. I realize hes coming at the best time because this spirtual war is no joke and I feel he is coming to help me take down demons for the Lord. I have changed my whole view on marriage. My helpmate and I we got work to do. Now with this said. I pray all of you rcv your helpmate real soon in Jesus name. huggins


Last edited by LovetoworshipJesus on Sat May 30, 2009 10:36 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : correction in spelling)

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by LovetoworshipJesus on Sat May 30, 2009 10:22 am

cholette I love that story Thank you for sharing!! I love when GOd does that. I am smiling all day since you shared that.

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Virtuous on Tue Jun 02, 2009 6:45 am

Desiree,

It has not been easy. When you know what it feels like to have icing put on your cake Censored ; not having it when the cake is screaming for it, sometimes drive you crazy. I have 4 kids. So you know I know what it feels like. I'm just soooo tired of being hurt.

I want the man God has chosen for me because I know He can't make mistakes. I used to pray and ask God not to send me an ugly man or a man who couldn't satisfy me in bed because that really bothered me. I mean, no one wants an ugly man or someone who can't satisfy them intimately, right? But God knows what I like and I truly believe when He sends him to me he is going to be more than I could've ever imagine. I just get so excited sometimes that I can't do anything but smile.

I do realize that we as women and men of God - we can't marry just anybody. I had a dream about a month ago (I posted it) about marrying the wrong man. I learned through that dream that the ministry my husband and I have will be aborted if I marry someone else or vice versa. All I could think about in my dream was, "Oh, no! I married the wrong man. What's going to happen to our (me and my husband) ministry?" I was so scared that I had messed it up and in all actuality, I WILL mess it up if I don't seek God for confirmation concerning who I'm suppose to marry.

I'm feeling like lovetoworshipjesus. I think the times are coming upon me that my husband and I will be joined together. Just as Cholette said about the young man and woman who met and became engaged within a few months; I don't feel that my husband and I will have a long dating period. God is going to confirm and give us His permission and His blessing for us to unite without dating long.

These past couple of months - sometimes even daily since God cancelled the assignment of the enemy from my life - I have been talked to about marriage. People who don't know me very well, just start talking to me about getting married, the role of a wife, the role of a husband, our role together in ministry and everything. I know it's only God preparing me to receive my husband.

I'm willing to wait. What do I have to lose? Absolutely nothing. God is going to blow OUR socks off!!!!!!!

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by Desiree (Starpop) on Tue Jun 02, 2009 9:53 am

I'm willing to wait. What do I have to lose? Absolutely nothing. God is going to blow OUR socks off!!!!!!!
:yes: ...I couldn't agree more--AMEN Sister!

cholette, thanks for sharing that wonderful inspiring story! Again, it all depends on the couple--some take a while to "know" eachother and some dont (let me be apart of the ones that don't lol! ) but yet one thing is true for both: THEY JUST KNEW and the meetings were so "unexpected"! :clap:

Love you guys from the bottom of my heart! huggins kiss

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Re: Knowing your husband/wife beforehand

Post by LovetoworshipJesus on Tue Jun 02, 2009 10:01 pm

Amen!! Well said Desiree. I want to be apart of whatever Gods has... I know one thing I find myself lately realizing that I miss my helpmate alot. but never the less I thank God for this awesome meeting!! My helpmate and I are going to be so bless. He will be a godly friend, caretaker, provider, business partrner, chef, workout trainer, romancer, priest of our home. etc oh yes of course my husband!! lol! Yes I ask God to allow this great worshiper of Jesus to be a full package!! AS I delight mysled in GOd he will give me the desires of my heart!! I pray the same for everyone on this line waiting for the perfect helpmate. That your heart desires will blow you away!! gotta go stay living for the Kingdom. By the way I told GOd please send the man fo God right away because I need help slaying the enemy!! I notice As I go up in the Lord the bigger the demons get. I believe thats why God allows us to rcv our helpmate not only to fulfill for his glory but there strength in numbers especially when there is a covenant. A cord that can not be broken thumbs

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