My daughter lost her winter coat?

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My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by Daisy on Sat Dec 24, 2011 6:45 am

I had a dream we were at church I think. My daughter lost her winter jacket. I was disappointed that she lost it. Somehow we ended up in walmart, and I was searching for a new winter coat for her. The clerk who worked there showed me where they all were. I told my daughter to go and pick out whatever one she wanted to. Most of them were super ugly. The one I liked was too expensive. I then remembered how low our bank account was. We wouldn't be able to get a new one today. bandaid


Ephesians 2:8,9 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by GreatFulServant on Sun Dec 25, 2011 1:19 am

Daisy is there something you would like to give your daughter and you feel like you can't. Whether it is physical, social, emotional, spiritual, or financial?

Phillipians 4,13,19
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.
But my God shall supply all your need (not just material) according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by L4JC on Sun Dec 25, 2011 10:08 pm

Daisy, Not sure if I'm allowed to share thoughts of your dream or not. But thought I'd give my thoughts, it's not an interpretation, just an insight of what I feel is in my heart.

As you already know, Joseph in the Bible got a special dream coat from His father Jacob... represents an "annointing" or special "favor". Maybe you want to show "favor" on your daughter and make her feel "special" but she isn't "appreciating" you when you attempt to try to do that? Making your own "self-worth" as a Mom, feel less than?

Just a thought or two. I'm asking the Lord to show His insight with you!

God bless!

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by Daisy on Tue Dec 27, 2011 5:54 am

GreatFulServant wrote:Daisy is there something you would like to give your daughter and you feel like you can't. Whether it is physical, social, emotional, spiritual, or financial?

Right now we are getting back on our feet financially. I would like to give her more of her wants, but kids will always want more toys and stuff...but she seriously lacks for nothing she actually needs in this area. Since a winter coat is a need I would assume that this is prob along the lines of me providing something for her other than a physical need. In the dream she lost her coat, irl we are working on helping her become more responsible. I do feel that she needs more of my attention emotionally, more playtime and one on one time with me. I do feel at times though, that she is never satisfied with the amount of time I am able to give her...like its never quite enough. We adopted her at the age of 2. Since the birth of our son, its really been a major struggle for attention...she wants all of it. This has been a major struggle of mine. She is mad that she has a brother, and doesn't like to share the attention. He is a very content child, but I feel the opposite for her...she is always wanting more...and more is never enough. I almost ignore him when she is around, bc she compares everything and is still very jealous even though its 3.5 years later. Please dont think Im a horrible mom for saying all this. Maybe this is what the dream is about. I am really going to pray about this! Please pray for me too. Thank you so much for sharing Greatful, and for your really good questions! happy dance


Ephesians 2:8,9 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by Daisy on Tue Dec 27, 2011 6:03 am

L4JC wrote:Daisy, Not sure if I'm allowed to share thoughts of your dream or not. But thought I'd give my thoughts, it's not an interpretation, just an insight of what I feel is in my heart.

As you already know, Joseph in the Bible got a special dream coat from His father Jacob... represents an "annointing" or special "favor". Maybe you want to show "favor" on your daughter and make her feel "special" but she isn't "appreciating" you when you attempt to try to do that? Making your own "self-worth" as a Mom, feel less than?

Just a thought or two. I'm asking the Lord to show His insight with you!

God bless!
Hi L4JC! Thanks for your thoughts...you are always more than welcome to share your thoughts with me. See my posting above referring to Greatful's posting...your posting actually goes along with what I put down! I like the part about the coat with Joseph! I didn't think of that! I do feel that I give her more at times than my son, and that she doesn't always appreciate it...but seems to want or need more. There is something I am lacking here, I just need the Lords revelation and help. I also do think I attach my self worth as a mom to her performance/behavior. Please pray for me about these things, and thank you so much for your thoughts!


Ephesians 2:8,9 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by L4JC on Tue Dec 27, 2011 8:48 am

I'm praying for you Daisy! I know it's a struggle with kids, too, with the attention! I had 2 foster children a few years ago and one of them just dominated my attention and was extremely jealous of my attention to her sister. It was a daily battle and common occurance in our daily life. It got to the point I had to take her to counseling because I felt this was an issue and wanted to get this "opened" up to find out the real source of the "fear" that she had about losing me to her sister. We talked often about "fear" isn't of God and I showed Bible stories (The Golden Book - it's a children's Bible book - it's fabulous!) that pertained to this to help her understand that jealousy isn't of God and that we are responsible for our own actions. It took time to get her to unlearn this behavior through the "counselor's suggestions" of behavior modification which included "time out" and privileges being taken away. I had to learn not to give her the attention even when she demanded it. I gave "Mommy-time" at certain times of each day just for "her". I had to show her that "love" isn't demanding, and that we must "love" and be "patient" in all things. It wasn't always successful but I do pray through it, she did learn some valuable lessons while living with us, on how to give and receive "love". (they were sent back to their mother after a year of living with us).

I couldn't help but shake the feeling you have been through exactly what I went through with my oldest foster child, with her younger sister. I pray the Lord will give you insight on how to handle your daughter with her demands of attention. This to me, tells me she's got a "fear" of some sort of losing you to someone else, your son. I'll be praying that the Lord will show you insight on how to teach her like I had to do with my own foster child. It wasn't easy, but I knew I had to, as her foster mom, otherwise I would feel "guilty" all the time, and I knew this wasn't God's way.

I would recommend sharing the "Love is patient" verse with her daily, for her to memorize (not the long version in 1 Cor. 13:4 -Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.) because she's just a child, but a shorter version that means the same thing, and make it into a fun learning game or into a "song" to sing together, as part of your time with her. Veggie Tales has lots of songs on their DVD's like these. My foster child fell in love with these DVD's. You and your husband can have "pretend" situations (playtime) that show examples of how to handle "fear" and show how to resolve these "fear" times with praying to Jesus. These playtimes can be a real teaching tool without her even realizing it!

Have your daughter learn more verses like these that will saturate into her spirit and eventually will bring an inner change that would manifest outwardly towards you and her brother. I'm praying for you all, my friend!

And I pray I didn't intrude by sharing recommendations ... I just wanted to share what has helped me with my oldest foster child and what worked, and perhaps, it could work with you, as well. Please do as you decide what is best for you and your daughter. God bless you! :0)

Sunny

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by tbsmilesbig on Tue Dec 27, 2011 11:03 am

Wow!! I do not have children and I even took notes, Sunny!! laugh

Great example and I'm sure seeds were planted in your foster child that God will continue to water over her lifetime; he has definitely brought back some of my childhood memories, showing me that he was there!

Blessings to you, Daisy on finding a way to help your daughter! wave


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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by L4JC on Tue Dec 27, 2011 11:22 am

tbsmilingsbig - thank you for your encouraging words, but I give total credit to the Lord Jesus here for that! And I do pray that I did plant some seeds for Jesus to water in the girls for a lifetime! I'm glad the Lord showed you memories of your past that He truly was there for you! I love those moments of intimacy! God is great and I love Him so dearly! :hooray: Have a wonderful blessed day in the Lord!

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by Daisy on Thu Dec 29, 2011 7:34 am

Thank you everyone for you comments! All of your comments have helped so much! :hooray:

@L4JC Your post made me bawl!!! crying I cannot thank you enough for your posting! It feels SO good to know I am not alone, and also to know the root to this behavior is fear! I will be using your advice and words of wisdom for my situation. I was so afraid of sounding like a horrible parent by writing the things I did, but to know I was understood mean so much to me! I def have been carrying guilt around with me concerning this issue...bc I have felt like Im falling short of meeting her needs. I think I have also had some unrecognized resentment, for feeling so demanded of at times. I will be using the word of God about love, and also doing more "mommy time". Thank you so much for your support and prayers...they are SO appreciated!!! What a blessing you have been to me L4JC!!! thank you


Ephesians 2:8,9 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by L4JC on Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:00 am

Daisy, I pray my post was helpful to you, and you know you have me as a friend if you ever need to talk... you can email me personally! I'll be praying for you and your daughter! There's nothing like a system to follow to help give structure for your child. She'll appreciate you in the long run for doing so. In the beginning, it won't be appreciated, and she'll sense the change and may rebel... but don't let that detour you, be consistent and I promise you - she'll learn to appreciate you even more because you care enough to show her what limits she's allowed to do! I'll be praying for you and for your daughter! God bless you Daisy! Hugs! :hooray:

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by Daisy on Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:38 pm

You have been extremely helpful! Bless you L4JC!!! Thank you so much for your support!!! I cant thank you enough!!!


Ephesians 2:8,9 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by Dove-Solutions on Fri Dec 30, 2011 7:38 am

Thank you Lord for showing us that we are never alone. Thank you for sending people into our lives that can understand our greatest struggles and concerns. Thank you for connecting L4JC and Daisy so they can help each other with your love and support to help a child grow in the way of the Lord! We send love, peace and joy to this young girl and pray that she will see that love is divine and comes from you. That no matter who else may or may not love her that you will always love her and will never let her go. We pray for your guidance in this matter and pray for strength and courage for Daisy to do what you instruct. We also pray that she will have peace and the comfort of your love.

In Jesus name we pray, amen.

your servant,

Connie


~Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Himand He will direct your path.~ Proverbs 3:5-6

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by jaenmari on Fri Dec 30, 2011 10:52 pm

Hi, there.

Some thoughts just came to mind on watching the conversations. this is not an interpretation but only my thoughts. It could be that the coat actually symbolizes, in your daughter's case, her identity and security. A wintercoat wraps you up and makes you warm and fuzzy and protects you against the cold.

when you are looking for a new coat for her and you see that the only one you actually like is too expensive, it could be that only God can truly satisfy her need for attention and security. Only when she finds her identity in Christ, she will be truly satisfied. I have gone through a season where God taught me to be hidden in Him, wrapped up in Him, like the wintercoat wraps us up. I often find that when I dream about going to a store it is to stock up on "spiritual food". Walmart stocks everything just like our Father stocks everything in His Heavenly store. There is a coat that is just right for her.

Just some thoughts huggins

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by Daisy on Tue Jan 03, 2012 10:49 am

jaenmari wrote:Hi, there.
It could be that the coat actually symbolizes, in your daughter's case, her identity and security. A wintercoat wraps you up and makes you warm and fuzzy and protects you against the cold.

when you are looking for a new coat for her and you see that the only one you actually like is too expensive, it could be that only God can truly satisfy her need for attention and security. Only when she finds her identity in Christ, she will be truly satisfied.
WOW!! Thank you Jaenmari! Amazing revelation! God is revealing piece by piece what he is speaking here!

Thank you everyone for you support and help!!!


Ephesians 2:8,9 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.

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Re: My daughter lost her winter coat?

Post by Daisy on Tue Jan 03, 2012 10:51 am

Dove-Solutions wrote:Thank you Lord for showing us that we are never alone. Thank you for sending people into our lives that can understand our greatest struggles and concerns. Thank you for connecting L4JC and Daisy so they can help each other with your love and support to help a child grow in the way of the Lord! We send love, peace and joy to this young girl and pray that she will see that love is divine and comes from you. That no matter who else may or may not love her that you will always love her and will never let her go. We pray for your guidance in this matter and pray for strength and courage for Daisy to do what you instruct. We also pray that she will have peace and the comfort of your love.

In Jesus name we pray, amen.

your servant,

Connie

Amen Connie! Thank you! huggins


Ephesians 2:8,9 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.

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