Repost Being with friends who I was with in mission school with and talking about codependency.

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Repost Being with friends who I was with in mission school with and talking about codependency.

Post by hisbeauty4ashes on Tue Oct 28, 2008 4:57 pm

Hi precious ones,

I think I may know the interpretation to this one but just wanted conformation.

Dream,

I was with a Australian married couple and a married couple from Ireland from my mission school in Africa.These friends were showing their missions video of places they had gone on missions as we were sitting on the couch. I enjoyed seeing the movie clips video as my heart was left in the mission field having to come home and do five surgeries in the natural. Then we laughed and had a great time of fun. They spent the night at my house and one of my family members where here and we were all sleeping in bunk beds.My friends wanted to get up and play and goof off I was worried they were going to wake my family member up like my mom or something so I am like lets move the party out of here. I loved them because they were so care free and fun and they were like pouring drinks as they were walking down the mall hallway. I was having a blast and then I sat down with an older couple from church at this like restaurant and I was telling them how good it was for my married couple to be so free like they are. Then this older married couple asked about another couple of friends of mine who were single. I told they had been in a serious care accident and my friend Vicki was miracle to even be with us and alive. Vicki I do not know in real life. Then the the older couple said to me," Yes they can be free and play while their young before they have a family, then things will settle down for them." I said," I have seen it where a child grows up taking care of siblings and even parents and they are never free to play or experience any kind of freedom because they are codependent. This older couple from church just sat there and listened.

Thanks and many hugs
Jeanie

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Re: Repost Being with friends who I was with in mission school with and talking about codependency.

Post by butterfly on Wed Nov 26, 2008 6:49 am

thinking praying

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Re: Repost Being with friends who I was with in mission school with and talking about codependency.

Post by RnestseekR on Wed Nov 26, 2008 9:35 am

Jeanie,
When you were giving the last line of your dream talking about "I have seen it where a child grows up taking care of siblings/parents and are never free to play or have any freedom b/c they are codependent."
Can you clarify what your thought process was at all? Were you thinking of kids who get stuck w/ absent parents, so they raise their siblings? Or just those who seem to be caregivers in life? Caregivers do not necessarily have to be codependent. But codepedents have dysfunctional relationships with people in which they derive their sense of self by having some one depedent on them. As such, they never make the other person responsible for their own actions. For example, an alcoholic father and his codependent daughter. The daughter has learned to get her identity and sense of being needed. Perhaps she runs the household, too and may enjoy being "in charge" while dad is incapacitated. She may not ever force dad to be responsible for his drinking because she is getting benefits from the situation (all-be-it warped).
The older couple were making a normal, healthy observation. As we grow up, new responsibilities come in to our lives that cause us to behave a different way. But your observation and reply back was that you have seen dysfunction. What does that mean to you? Do you think you are perhaps expressing a fear or concern?

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Re: Repost Being with friends who I was with in mission school with and talking about codependency.

Post by hisbeauty4ashes on Wed Nov 26, 2008 10:45 am

Yes I have seen a lot of dysfunction in the lives of others who were in a situation where their father and mothers where alcoholic's all the time and their relationships were of dysfunction.

Hope this helps I think I already and have the interpretation.

Thanks
Jeanie

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Re: Repost Being with friends who I was with in mission school with and talking about codependency.

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