Hey guys. Lately I've been very down concerning my work etc. First of all I can not stand working at this place anymore. Never in my life have I met such evil people as I'm working with here. It will take too long to explain everything. I'm honest if I say that I never believed that you really get such bad people in real life. A few other people working with me feel exactly the same. Funny enough all of us feeling this way are children of God. Problem is I get paid a good salary that I won't easily get elsewhere. It is not a lot, but it is more than most people pay in this town. I can not go work for less than this, because me, my hubby and children are struggeling already.

Secondly, ALL my friends from school (we were a huge group of friends) made something of their lives. Some of them are doctors, dentists, architects, phycologists etc. Their parents had a lot of money, so they could study further after we left high school. I was the only one who's parents were divorced and struggled financially. My precious mother couldn't afford for me to go and study, which I understand completely. It's just so sad to me 'cause I'm the only one who's always just done office jobs (like a secretary etc.). It is so frustrating because I wanted to study beauty technology or interior design because I love being creative. My whole life I haven't been happy at what I do and not very good at what I do because I'm a creative person. You guys, please I dont want it to sound like I feel very sorry for myself, but it is becoming a huge issue in my life. I too want to be successfull at what I do, I too want to make sure my children have a bright future for them to go and study further. I'm so tired of struggling financially. I can not explain to you how this feels. Since I was a little girl I've always had these high expectations of what I'm going to become one day, but sadly life doesn't always turn out that way.

I know God understands, because yesterday I received my daily devotion from Joel Osteen which was about exactly what my issue is. It was about making plans to succeed in your career and the dream that you have for your life. But my heart sank this morning again when I went online to check out some courses for interior design. It is so expensive!!!!!!!!!! To me it feels like I won't get anywhere without money! Why does it always have to be about money?

I don't know what to do guys, how can I do a course and get a diploma if I don't have any money. How can I become what God has put in my heart, what God made me to be, use the talents God gave me if everything costs money which we don't have?

I just ask for anyone to pray with me. I want to made a success of my future. I don't want to be the only friend left behind, not being successfull. It hurts.

Blessings
xxx

Siriant...check your personal mailbox here...I sent you a response

:bighug:

Sirianta -

I will keep you in my prayers.

Blessings,

Lurdys